Aun'va Ackbar!: February 2012

Welp. Today marked the first day I visited Warp Space Games (Run by a bunch of good chaps here) and played my first round against the gentlemen there. The Tau Force proves to be still a reasonably lethal army, proving that even nobs will still fall against the might of massed pulse rifles, plasma rifles, missile pods, and Railguns.

However, the fact that we need so much shit just to take away a squad of nobz is a testament to how badly nerfed we are against the existing codices. Personal misgivings aside, let's get straight onto the battle. My opponent was an Ork player going by the name of Warboss Hosey, running a massive ork blob with two trukks, wartrakks, and two squads of nobs. The mission was objective based, rolling a 3, which meant a total of 4 objectives. Objective placement was a bit derpy, to say the least. Two objectives easily within squad coherency stretching on two quarters of the table. After that, it was time to roll for mission deployment. Oh the excitement! Oh the glorious! Oh, the freaking Dawn of War.

I hate Dawn of War sometimes. Limiting your first turn lethality and essentially giving players time to set their forces in position is one thing. It's another when all your firepower relies on getting the first view, shooting really far away and smashing them to bits before they even get within range. Anyway, I chose to let Hosey deploy first, which he proceeded to drop a trukk full of Nobs and a Warboss. Right behind a ruin. When it came to my turn for deployment, I deployed Shas'O'Es'Oni right in front of the cathedral ruin, directly on the other side trukk, and proceeded to camp at my objectives quarter with two layers of Firewarriors. Then the plasma bolts and slugga rounds flew everywhere and everything started dying! Fun times.

TURN 1:
The first turn saw little action due to Dawn of War obscuring everyone's sight, while the heavy artillery were all rolling in from the table edge for both sides. The only thing worth mentioning is Es'Oni, of course. Thanks to the jump infantry rule, he popped right out of the cathedral and let loose a barrage of plasma and missiles into the Trukk. Which proceeded to penetrate and leave a big boom mark. Ramshackle happened, but could not save it from the effect that was explosion! No one was wounded, however. Damned toughskinned Nobz.

TURN 2:
Turn 2 saw the begin of hostilities as Hosey moved his 30 ork blob into position to start firing their big shootas at my 8 Firewarriors. Despite their loudness and strength, Orks are notoriously inaccurate shooters and their shots proceeded to murder only one out of eight firewarriors.

Then the most awesome thing happened. To the west was a trukk intent on flanking my firewarriors to kill them and seize the objectives. My Pathfinder devilfish decided to ruin it's day by first clogging up the entry point, and disembarking the two little gun drones. During my shooting face, they proceeded to start being awesome, both rolling a 5 on their to hit rolls. Another drone proceeded to increase that awesome level by rolling a six on the to-penetrate roll. And finally, on the penetrate result, it rolled ANOTHER 6. Ramshackle happened again, Hosey rolled a six. Nothing happened except the truck was wrecked, it's nobs forced to slog their way through the vehicle to get to the Firewarriors.

Meanwhile, a trio of Missile Pod Crisis Suits deep-striked right behind the Nobz. Seizing the opportunity from forcibly ejecting them from their transport, the suits proceeded to rain missile death on the nobs. Except, unlike the drones, they forgot to drink their badass medicine and only a nob was grievously injured, and unfortunately, alive.

TURN 3:
Turn 3 was where the hostilities reached a peak point, as a wartrakk moved itself into a position where it would continuously pelt my unfortunate firewarriors with big shootas. However, the ork seemed to be far more interested in shooting the birds circling in the sky than the firewarriors with their angry pulse rifles, as only one shot connected and was gloriously saved. (For Aun'Va!) The ork mob continued to pelt and clean up the failed attack, and eventually brought down the unfortunate firewarrior. But no leadership rolls yet because we still presevere!

Obviously, Hosey wasn't going to let my Missile Crisis team survive, so the Nobs charged and proceeded to brutalize the team. However, on the eastern side, the Stealthsuits and Shas'El'Lynu'Kau's team emerged from their reserves... and proceeded to wreck the secondary wartrakk and wound 3 out of the 2nd 30 ork squad, consisting of 'Ard Boyz. The Smart Missile System proved its worth this time around, however. As Markerlights lighted up the 30 ork squad that had been pelting my firewarriors to the ground, 12 shots fired at BS2 massacred a large chunk of the squad, which was then proceeded to be mauled further by the firewarriors returning fire. Eventually, the ork squad was reduced to only 14 orks. But their mob rule still made them fearless. Damn them!!!

Eventually, the missile crisis team lost combat on my assault turn and was then proceeded to have the snot beaten out of them as the big choppas descended on the poor bastard.

TURN 4-6:
Turn 4-5 wasn't anything particular excitable save for the slaughter of the recently arrived interlopers, and the firewarriors, now backed with firepower from the broadside, sent the 16 Ork squad running off the table with nothing but 5 orks remaining. After that it was a game of chicken. Hosey advanced with his nobs, intent on slaughtering my firewarriors and contesting the objective so that he would win as he controls two, and contests one, while I would only control one objective.

Alas, he underestimated the amount of sheer firepower I would unleash upon him: Submunition shots from the Hammerhead softened the tightly packed nobs from recently smashing the grav drives of the Devilfish, Pulse Rifles wore them down, and the commander eventually popped out the last remaining nob. Then it was the Warboss and Es'Oni to fight. Xeno-to-Xeno.

Predictably, despite the Tau Commander's bravado, he had done nothing except lock the warboss in combat, and proceeded to get slaughtered. However, his loss came with an opportunity, as the loss of my commander was on Hosey's assault turn, that meant that the warboss was now in clear sight of my entire Broadside team. With a little help from the pathfinders, the broadsides delivered a solid rail slug into the face of the warboss, utterly annihilating him. Strength 10 AP 1, fools!

After the combat, the surviving warboss declared himself the new boss of the klan, and decided to cut their losses and retreat. Similarly, the Tau forces retreated as well, with both their leaders grievously injured and with no way of securing the objectives from the massive remaining ork mob.

Post-game thoughts In hindsight perhaps I shouldn't have deepstriked the Missile Pod team right into the back of the nobs, even if that did buy time to keep the nobs away for one extra turn so I could plug the opening with my Devilfish. Likewise, Lynu'Kau's team wasn't very effective here as well, as they enemy was not running a heavy armor list. Using the stealthsuits without targetting arrays made me realize how useless 18 Burst Cannon shots were if they didn't hit anything.

The broadsides and the Pathfinders were lethal in this game. With the extremely low amount of terrain in the field, the combo could tear the enemy apart before any Ork even realized they were dead. All in all, forcing a draw in the game was good enough for me: Better a draw than a complete and total defeat.

Casualties [Tau]:
2 HQ
2 Elite
1 troop
1 vehicle

Casualties [Ork]:
1 HQ
1 Elite
1 Troop
4 Vehicles

Farsight would return to teach these ork looters a true brutal lesson. But until then, it's time to lick our wounds and restrengthen the airborne assault force!

"Each must find their own way. If those in our heartland had witnessed the savageries of the void as have we they would know this. The hand of each of the starfarers is turned against the other; none will join their strength together just to see their ancient enemies prosper. Neither should we." -Commander Farsight

First and foremost, this blog does not contain any useful advice. This blog is just a rambling space for a Tau player who consistently suffers BSoDs and PTSDs as a result of misunderstanding your enemy and horrific dice rolls. This is purely for people to laugh at my failures and maybe garner sympathy for the amount of horrific dice rolls I suffer throughout my life, and also show that when you don't have proper strategy, as well as lady luck on your side, you WILL suffer from horrendous casualties and ultimately, shameful defeat.

Apart from the self bashing, welcome to the Ksi'M'Yen forces outpost! This is probably the only blog I might actually bother to constantly update, since I play 40k regularly now (HAHAHA REGULARLY.) and I've nearly completed my 1750 points list, which is a standard points list for the folks at the local game shop I play at.

Many people would say that Tau is a "low tier" army, and frankly with the amount of setbacks I suffer I would agree. However, reading other blogs, in particular for those who are trained in the Tau art of war far longer than I have, I've come to realize that Tau combat is extremely fluid. It's sort of like mental kung fu, in my opinion. You will end up bruised, and horrifically scarred in the beginning. But as you play more and more games, you will realize that a total victory achieved with a Tau army represents the epitome of your skill. (And no. Spamming broadsides do not count.)

I play one of the most cookie cutter Tau lists out there. (Crisis Spam, backed up with a little bit of Broadside artillery.) And it is very easily beaten when you don't have the proper placement of the models, and your opponents are REALLY cunning when it comes to fighting and line of sight placement.

If I complain and whine about Tau Army so often, why don't I just go ahead and play SPESS MAHREENS? Truth be told. I am considering a Dark Angels Deathwing spam list, if only because I am finally sick of the amount of times I've gotten my shit ruined horrifically because of land raiders. However, I'm not done with the Tau art of war yet. I've only played 40k consistently for a year, so it's still too early to give up. And it's only recently that I've finally gotten my shit together to start playing the Tau way properly.

And with that said, I'll probably publish all my future battles in friendly matches and maybe CM tourneys on this blog. Maybe by keeping track of what I always miss and how I fail I might actually improve. It will also touch on why, even with the advice of the most senior veterans, tactics WILL fail without fluidity, and strategies crumble completely because of lady luck being a complete bitch.

Gentlemen, welcome to the fraking Jihad.

"The strength of your force may be calculated by multiplying its weight by its velocity. Strive always to maximize both and victory shall be yours." - Commander Puretide

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Post Battle report - Against the Green TIde

Thursday, February 9, 2012

the Ksi'M'Yen Por'L'Tio'Ve (Airborne Assault) Expeditionary force.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

When the new necrons were released:

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

The path of technology.